"You called, you shouted, you shattered my deafness: you shone with dazzling light and dispelled my blindness; you were fragrant and I breathed in deeply and now I am breathless with longing for you. I tasted you and now I hunger and thirst for you, you touched me and now I burn with desire for the peace that is yours."

Augustine

i am blessed.

the thing about the community i'm a part of is that people are rarely constant. what i mean is there's a lot of coming and going, people's visas run out, their trips come to an end, family issues etc. after a while you get used to it, you get used to the farewell dinners, saying goodbye, the final hug for who knows how long, the "i'll come visit you when i come to (insert country name here)" or just "i'll see you in the glory". it just becomes a part of what we do. but every so often someone comes and goes and it's like you blink and they're here and they walk into your life at the time you needed an angel, a sister, a friend. and they totally change your life, even in 3 weeks. and you feel like you've known them your whole life and you'll always be sisters. and they leave but the goodbye is sweet in the knowing that God crossed your paths at that particular moment in time, that he took the two of you, ants, and let you grow together for 21 days. and the goodbye is sweet because you know and you know and you know that you'll meet again. before the glory. to my angel, kelly spencer. for arriving in my nightmare and waking me up to the reason i do what i do and the reality that the world is actually full of people who genuinely care and love. and i am forever thankful for everything you've given me. your joy overflows. you are always in my heart. see you soon.

My heart is stirred by a noble theme, bringing blessed words unto my king. Giving up my love as a sweet offering. Oh, the beauty of this Man!

For the sake of love, He left His Father's throne, searching for a bride bone of His bone, such a humble kiss to make our dust His own. Oh, the beauty of this man!

See His hands, His head, His feet and His side. They bear the marks of wrath, a pure sacrifice, to secure her love by giving up His life. Oh, the beauty of this Man!

She now faint with love, beacons Him to come establish righteousness as God's risen Son. And on that glorious day, she'll marry her fair one. Oh, the beauty of this Man!

Mind if I boast for a moment?

wow, my friends are so hip and good looking

just sayin'.

Oh Daddy, It's a Wonderland.

let's not make this hurt. i know i care too much. stupid girl.

i'm scared of feeling like this. it's all so new, bear with me.

"My lover is radiant and ruddy, outstanding among ten thousand.."

-Song of Songs 5:10

Somehow my weakness has overwhelmed You

Somehow my weak love has stolen away Your heart.

(click image)

The Lord is moving on my heart. He's raising me up for missions, He's setting me apart to partner with Him to see revival in my generation. He's sending me to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania in September 2010 to walk with Him and learn what's on His heart for me, for my ministry and for my nation. I don't know how this is going to happen yet. All I know is that God is the provider of the universe, and that I am called to walk in radical devotion to Him, intimacy with His heart and obedience to His calling. He's calling me to pursue the "one thing" that burned on King David's heart, to "dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek Him in His temple" (Psalm 27:4). I won't be silent any longer, my God is the God who reigns over the earth, He imagined the stars and gives them light. My Lord is righteous and unchanging, His love for me is infinite and eternal. I lay myself down and I say to my Jesus, "I am yours, I live to make your name high".. He hears my cry and He answers me with his loving tenderness. He is mine.

hephzibah

-my delight is in her

"Light me on fire and let the world come watch me burn"

-John Wesley

look at the stars, look how they shine for you.

fire & fragrance

And I shake off these ashes like the dust beneath my feet, and I forsake this world like the world's forsaken me, and I embrace Your mercy 'cause Your mercy set me free

and I arise

I arise

I arise

I wanna be captivated by Your beauty,

Letting Your fiery eyes consume me,

Standing in the midst of all Your glory

This one thing I seek

you know, there actually is something better. you don't have to keep living like this.