i'm a teeny weeny bit really quite scared.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Depression, when it's clinical, is not a metaphor. It runs in families and it's known to respond to medication and counselling. However, truly you believe there's a sickness to existence that can never be cured. If you're depressed you will sooner or later surrender and say: I just dont want to feel bad anymore. The shift from despressive realism to tragic realism, from being immobilized by darkness to being sustained by it. Thus strangley seem's to require believing in the possibility of a cure...
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
live for today, we'll dream tomorrow, we've got big plans in sight. we'll take this city, and by nightfall the bright lights are calling. everything is going our way. everything is just as we planned. this is our future for what we've heard, and i've still got your hand.
and it feels like we could last forever, and i'm not doing this alone.
when memories fade we've got eachother, when time and confusion collide, singing;
i hold it all when hold you.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
somewhere in the middle of everyone hating everyone
and copying each other for attention and trying to make something pretty just to get laid.
we actually said something to each other.
we are all lonely and scared
we all have problems,
we all love someone way too fucking much.
let's talk about it.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
i wish i was strong.
i wish it was summer.
i wish you still knew me.
i wish people could understand.
i wish i lived in a different country.
i wish i knew how to make things right.
i wish i could tell someone everything again.
i wish i could start this year over and make less mistakes.
i wish i didn't wish for you.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
do you remember how we met? silhouetted by the lights... you were drunk and tried to take a mental picture with your hands. i was thinking about that and a bunch of other things. stop looking at the floor... i need to pour out this expansive dose of words. i can't explain... i need to be alone.
i know the timing isn't great, but these things you just can't plan. i just need a little time so i can find myself again. 'cause I get buried underneath all the things they think you are, and i'm too tired to pretend it doesn't hurt to be left out.
i had a pocket full of dreams, but i gave them all to you. now i think i want them back, so can you tell me if i'm crazy or confused? don't ever change the way you are... i've never loved anyone more.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
you know they're all the same.
you know you're doing better on your own, so don't buy in.
live right now. yeah, just be yourself.
it doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else.
it just takes some time, little girl
you're in the middle of the ride,
everything, everything will be just fine.
everything, everything will be alright.
jimmy eat world are so my new drug.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
there's a house across the river but alas i cannot swim, and a garden of such beauty that the flowers seem to grin. there's a house across the river but alas i cannot swim, i'll live my life regretting that i never jumped in.
there's a boy across the river with short black curly hair, he wants to be my lover and i want to be his peer. there's a boy across the river, but alas i cannot swim and i never will get to put my arms around him.there's a life across the river that was meant for me, instead i live my life in constant misery.
there's a life across the river but i do not see why i should please those who will never be pleased..
Saturday, August 15, 2009
crazy, blurry, fire on one side, flood on the other, people-i-love-dying nightmare. woke up at 10:23, couldn't open my eyes, couldn't walk straight, dripping with sweat, crazy migraine.
and now lucy's not replying to me checking she's okay cos part of my nightmare involved her dying infront of me.
this isn't nice.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
-7.40am date with bethany thismorning.
-listening to marianas trench instead of doing my plot summary in english.
-getting out two books at the library and returning them within ten minutes because i realised i don't/can't read.
-sister got me wendys at lunch.
-dissecting a lamb heart in biology.
- smores party with my family tonight.
-and... UNDEROATH ARE COMING TO PARACHUTE 2010! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
i see it around me, i see it in everything. i could be so much more than this. i said my goodbye's, this is my sundown i'm gonna be so much more than this. with one hand high you'll show them your progress. you'll take your time but no one cares, no one cares. i need you to show me the way from crazy i wanna be so much more than this.
good goodbye lovely time. good goodbye to sunshine, i'll be fine.