In awe of the timing of the Lord,

His leadership is always perfect.

This is the part where I freak out because I'm insecure and broken and so, so imperfect. I so badly wish I could wipe the past away, I'm sick of feeling ruled by my mistakes. I just want you to show me you care. But if you don't, I understand. And it is no fault of yours.

You've got so much love in you.

I'm still not very good at liking what I see in the mirror every morning.

I'm not very good at channeling my frustration into something worthwhile.

I'm horrible at keeping my mind in the present.

I love the wrong things far too much and don't give enough time to the things I should.

My heart still hurts, but not as much as it used to.

I always miss people.

I always wish my apologies meant something.

I still sometimes want to self-destruct and when it gets really bad I always know how to isolate myself for a while, but I wish I wasn't like that.

I wish I wasn't so anxious about everything.

I wish I didn't constantly daydream about the boy.

I wish I had the patience to wait for him and not get so ahead of myself.

Mostly I wish I had the ability to stop every once in a while and appreciate what I do have. I wish I could rest easy in the knowledge that it will all work out perfectly and these momentary challenges are merely to encourage me to grow stronger and to fall more in love with my Creator.

He holds my world in His hands.

Oh sweet

perfect

wonderful,

gorgeous boy.

You make my heart sing.

I'll be waiting for you baby,

I'll be holding back the darkest night.

If it's right, baby

our time will come.

And when it does, it will be wonderful.

Our time together is just never quite enough.

Don't you ever stop being dandy.

I wish you were mine.

If you'll be my boat,

I'll be your sea.

I live to make you free.

I'm on fire when You're near me.

I'm on fire when You speak.

"Freedom-I want to be free.

I want to hold back the hands that cut, unlock the prison doors, dance in the sun rise and swim in the waves. I want to scream truth louder than the lies, give the hungry, thirsty, homeless and poor everything they need to meet every single need they have and will have. I want to not be crippled by my past and shortcomings. I want to encourage rather than gossip. I want to bring healing. I want to comfort those who mourn. I want to proclaim victory. I want to lead the way to freedom. Where children can laugh and dance and be embraced by their parents. Where the poor are rich and the last are first. Where addictions are weak and chains are broken. Where the only blood that will be shed has shed and cheeks know not the touch of tears. Where hearts are confident in love and community thrives in fellowship. Where slavery is nonexistent. Freedom. Freedom. Freedom."

You look like the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.

For today, thank you.

For being open with me

and for letting me be open with you.

Your story offered me the grace to share mine.

Some of it for the first time

ever.

So for that, thank you.

Does he kiss your eyelids in the morning

When you start to raise your head?

And does he sing to you incessantly

From the space between your bed and wall?

Oh, does he know that place below your neck

That's your favorite to be touched?

And does he cry through broken sentences

Like, "I love you far too much"?

your eyes feel so warm and familiar. baby let's stay in this moment forever.

nerves nerves nerves.

This city sleeps quiet as the day rushes over the world. The pain of the night sinks through rooftops and rests on those who simply can't take any more. This small town. This crying city. This broken Nation reaches for a Saviour. Cries out for a Redeemer as the world takes hold of their hearts. This beautiful people. Full of culture and life, the first to see the sun rise every morning, at the ends of the earth, hiding so much pain. Hiding some of the highest suicide rates in the world, hiding hundreds of abortions every day, hiding broken families, hiding the ache of loss and failure. This nation in desperate need of cleansing. With blood on our hands.

We cry - Set us ablaze Abba, heal Aotearoa.

The first time I see Your face

Everything else around me will fade to the background

And I'll be struck full by the truth in Your gaze

As You work an indelible change in me

Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you.

Sometimes I just need to drive around aimlessly by myself. But sometimes I park up and sit with my head in my hands and realize I dislike my own company more than what I was running from in the first place. And that's the place where it hurts.

Your eyes must do some raining if you're ever gonna grow.

Every day I wake up, I have to choose to believe that love runs deeper than pain, that freedom is stronger than bondage and mercy is bigger than fear. I wake up and look full into the face of the Creator. I choose to discard loneliness and heartache. I choose to fall again onto His promises. Joy comes in the morning. His blood speaks a better word. I can either be weighed down by my insecurities or I can choose to walk above them. No longer do I live under a spirit of bondage. I am free, even when my heart aches. There is beauty to capture far beyond my hurting.

Take me there.

I haven't been here in so long, but it's still all too familiar.

Hello loneliness, my old friend.

"Every funeral Jesus went to He raised the person from the dead. Jesus doesn't do funerals, not even his own." Rick McKinley

Mark me with fire and send me among the living dead.

The truth is, you're going to leave whether I want you to or not. So when the time comes, why would I try and stop you. I'd rather follow. Let me see your world, darling. We could be beautiful.

There's so much I need to say to you.

when you're near

it feels like healing.

my heart beats faster with you around the bend.

Come a little closer,

It's time you see these scars.

This is humility;

the King of the universe came as a baby (Matt. 1:21-25)

This is influence;

thousands came to sit on a hill and hear Him preach (Matt. 5:1)

This is power;

He healed the blind (Matt. 10:27-31)

This is compassion;

He stood in the gap and wrote in the sand (John 8:1-12)

This is true rest;

He trades our burden of sin for an easy yoke (Matt. 11:25-30)

This is servanthood;

He washed His disciples' feet (John 13:1-17)

This is grace;

He shared the cup with His betrayer (Matt. 26:23)

This is pain;

He was sweating drops of blood in the Garden (Luke 22:44)

This is patience;

He didn't say a word (Is. 53:7)

This is love;

He hung on a tree for my brokenness (Matt. 27:35)

This is forgiveness;

His shed His blood for my purity (Rev. 5:9)

This is truth;

I belong to Him (Ezekiel 16:8)

This is a conquerer;

death couldn't hold Him (Matt. 24:1-12)

This is passion;

His eyes burn like blazing fire (Rev. 1:14)

This is beauty;

His face is like the shining sun (Rev. 1:16)

This is sovereignty;

He's coming again (Rev. 20)

This is the Son of God

This is the Redeemer of my soul

This is the Beginning and the End

This is Jesus

I love this city

but I've set and numbered it's days

I love this city

enough that I'll set it ablaze.

deep calls out to deep

Hear my cry, O God

I call as my heart grows faint.

I could write a long essay on the reasons why I love Seeley Booth.

(I'm addicted to "Bones" right now, what can I say.. I'm a total sucker for crime TV)

also favourite.

favourite.

"There is certainly much at stake. i don’t know your story or your dreams or the things that steal your sleep, but i know they matter. i hope your story is rich with other characters, rich with friends and conversation. i hope you know some people who will carry you and i hope you get to carry them. i hope that there is beauty in your memories and i hope it doesn’t haunt you. And if it does, then i hope there is someone who will talk you through the night and remind you of the promise of the sunrise, that beauty keeps coming, that there are futures worth waiting for and fighting for and that you were made to dream."

Jamie Tworkowski on Inception

oh travis.

"i'm convinced that the world is not small. that our meetings are not chance and our coincidences are not so. i'm convinced that the world is big. our journey is long, and the ones we meet along the way and get to share moments with are exactly the ones we should love with all the boldness and tenacity we can muster in our hearts. after all, the world is full of people who love, so what else is there to do, but love in return."

oh brandon.